Heather T.

Archive for January, 2009|Monthly archive page

When he was little.

In mothering, My Boy #1, My Family on January 30, 2009 at 11:33 am

Scriptor influenced the timing of this post. I just saw one of his posts this morning where you tag others to look up the fourth folder in your pictures files, then post the fourth picture. Well, I couldn’t exactly do that. In all of my files, I’ve already posted the fourth picture; so I decided to post the fourth from the bottom of the file. Whatever, right? I can make up my own rules ;o) being that I wasn’t tagged. I couldn’t keep to just one either. These were some favorites that I scanned awhile back, wanting to share with you and have since forgotten; until now.

These are all photo’s of my oldest son when he was young, some of my favorites; always quite photogenic he was. Most people think it odd that I call my first born my “baby”, but he is. He’s the one that brought me into motherhood. For the first two years of his life, it was just he and I at home. I experienced the wonder of bugs, tall grass, fish and everything else that caught his eye…all over again. He could make me laugh and cry. Not the easiest infant, was he…not at all. This is the child that I’m in tune with. Very often, we tend to think alike, react the same way to things and nurture in a familiar way. He’s great with little ones and they take right to him, as I always have been this way too. I know that it sounds as though I’m really talking him up…but that’s because I am. Why not? I’ll talk up the other two in a post of their own.

This child is my cautious one, also being a bit fearful of heights (like me) but having all the courage in the world when he decides to (like me). I know it also sounds like there’s nothing left of his character to be a remnant of his daddy, but there is….he is built very much like his dad, he looks very much like his dad and he has his dad’s sense of humor (which can sometimes get him into trouble).

The first photo shows his intense desire to know what this thing that he holds is, how it works, why it feels the way that it does. I love his concentration in it and I remember it well. It kept him amused for about 10 minutes, which is a long time for a little one like that. He kept me amused as I watched him.

The second photo was taken in the back field of where we lived then. What a gorgeous day that was with the sun shining and the grass so green. It was warm and the breeze was blowing. This was when he was just learning to have steady ground. He could walk, but with a wobble in the grass. I love this photo. He looks carefree and delighted.

The third photo was the day I let him play with rice. GB might recall me mentioning this once. I was always trying to find something to keep him amused then. It wasn’t easy, he always wanted

to be doing what I was doing and back then, I couldn’t let him get into the bookkeeping paperwork that I did. This day, I decided to dump some rice in the middle of the floor. I gave him some of his fun toys and cups, etc. The excitement didn’t last very long, needless to say.

This last photo was taken when he was about three years old. Sitting at the top of our stairs, I came around the corner looking for him and he pulled out some of his charm. The little turkey

always knew how to get out of trouble. I was going to scold him for going up there all by himself and he knew it. He gave me a wink and a smile. I said, “do it again…in just a minute…stay right there….I’m going to get my camera”.

So, I’ve been thinking about using some of my posts to recall my favorite moments, throwing in some pictures now and then; mostly because I need to do this for my boys to have some day. I’m not a scrapbooker…I am a computer-scrapper, writer, blogger lady…whatever. Anyway…this is the way I like it. I hope you don’t mind sharing the appreciation that I have for this life I live ;o).
{btw, you’ve got to click on these and see them full scale…they’ll make you smile}

Grief’s Gentle Touch

In My Life, my mom on January 30, 2009 at 12:46 am


Grief is such a strange thing to experience. Having lost a few close people in my life has not ever affected me in the same way as losing my mother has. I’ve said it before, I have not “lost” her…I know where she is; I just miss her.

Grief for me has been like a subtle tapping on my shoulder every now and then. I turn to find something is missing in my daily life, and I’m reminded that what is missing is my interaction with my mother.

Even to the littlest of things, I am reminded. The other day I was watching Max & Ruby (a preschoolers cartoon) and the little bunny’s Grandmother was in it. {tap-tap-tap…on my shoulder} My heart became sad to be reminded that my boys no longer will have this influence {her influence} in their lives {then The Lord reminds me that I am her daughter and I smile}.

This week, I’ve really had those moments of missing her. My little guy came downstairs the other night and I heard a familiar tune as he walked closer to me. He found my little yellow lamb that winds up. It plays the gentle tune of Mary Had a Little Lamb. I remember the night my mom brought it home to me. I was sleeping when she came into my room, wound up the little lamb and placed it under my arm. I believe I was only about four years old then.

Simply said…I miss my mother. I am able to live, grow, love and dance without her…but I miss her and it does hurt sometimes…and this is okay.

OMW-War

In OMW Prompts, PPS-Poetry-Prose-Stories I've Written on January 28, 2009 at 11:33 am

The One-Minute Writer: Today’s Writing Prompt: War: If you were all-powerful, would you stop all war? If so, how?

“War is within man. It begins with hurt, anger, frustration; the need to be known, understood, correct.

Love is also within man. It begins with kindness, appreciation, understanding; it grows through forgiveness, selflessness, compassion.

God is all powerful, I am not and will never be. Even in all of His power, He can not force man’s self will to stop hating or to begin loving. Man needs to wake up, let go of himself with open arms.

As a mother, I can see the inability to force good relationships between my boys. I can instill goodness by way of my own action, but I cannot make them love one another and I cannot force their hearts to forgive.

No matter, I don’t believe that war will end until the final straw as written in Revelation ;o).”

Masks

In PPP Prompts, PPS-Poetry-Prose-Stories I've Written on January 28, 2009 at 12:25 am

As she reached over to shut off the blaring alarm clock, she grabbed the mask of motherhood from the shelf. It’s a good thing that she did, because it wasn’t long before her first came to her in need of something.

Needs met.

She gathered her clothes and went down the stairs to shower, taking off the mask for just a few minutes. She enjoyed the water rushing down upon her head, flushing over the stress from yesterday and the needs of this morning. She found the truth of herself again.

Truth found.

As she stepped out of the bathtub, drying herself, she reached for the mask of employee. It’s a good thing that she grabbed it when she did, because the telephone rang a few minutes later and she ran out the door into the day.

Rushing invades.

She glances at the clock as she reaches the school driveway just in time to pick up her son. With cell phone in hand, she opens the door for him and he plops on the seat. She doesn’t even say hello, only smiles and he sighs. She notices his sigh and replaces the mask of employee with that of motherhood. She hangs up the phone and asks him about his day.

Love strikes.
They enter the door and find that her husband is home from work. She quickly adds the mask of beauty and duty, and he greets her with a kiss. She is ready to cook dinner. Walking into the kitchen, she finds the table splendidly decorated with all of her favorite tastes. He takes her hand, holds her close and whispers his love into her ear.
The masks shatter and he pulls from her the truth of who she is,
and he pours into her the truth of who she is.
In no need of a mask,
In all of her beauty,
In life itself,
She is Woman.

~ as I’ve shared at Pictures, Poetry & Prose today (with the photo as an exception, this was found on google…thank you)

My Own Space

In PPS-Poetry-Prose-Stories I've Written on January 28, 2009 at 12:16 am
I need a little now and then
Some time for me
Away from it all
Without obligation to anyone
My own space

I need a little now and then
Hearing without noise
In a quiet place
Leaving questions unanswered
My own space

I need a little now and then
Words without speech
Drifting through my mind
No one to listen
My own space

I need a little now and then
Guilt left behind me
In search of freedom
Releasing inner desires
My own space

I need a little now and then
My own space

~ as I’ve shared today over at Despair, Devastation & Dysfunction
(photo found on google..thank you)

Finally! I’ve captured him.

In Other Stuff on January 26, 2009 at 11:06 pm

I came home today from my afternoon bus run and found this little bugger in the middle of the living room. My littlest was so excited, trying to pet him and he actually did for a split second; he sure was proud of himself.

Later on, he came back out from underneath the couch and began wandering around my husbands work boots. Ray just got home from work, so there was still fresh snow and the smell of the cold winter air surrounding his boots.

The little mole couldn’t keep away from them. Ray put on some gloves to pick him up, so we could put him back outside; but before we did, I grabbed my camera. Poor little thing, if he wasn’t already blind…I didn’t do him any favors.

Ray caught him and we watched him take the little mole out to the side yard where some of the wood from the tree’s is. He set him down in the snow very gently and the little mole acted very happy to be on the cold snow again. It was a long adventurous day for this little guy. He dug his way down into the snow, little tale sticking up in the air, and found a way to a place he knew well underground.
We sure did enjoy having him, if only for a day…thankfully, only for a day! {If only I had a better camera to take these shots, they really don’t show how cute he is…oh well.}

Uh-oh

In Life Lessons on January 26, 2009 at 11:18 am

I may have been a little too friendly the other day, with my little mole visitor. I was just sitting on my couch at 6:00 a.m., spending some quiet time to myself, when something caught my attention. I looked over at the floor across the room and I saw a little black spot scurrying around.

We’ve been known to have mice in the house. I just saw one the other morning. Mice are quick. They don’t mosey around…they move fast. This one was moseying, nose first. I took a better look and saw this it was a mole, a little black mole. Never would I have thought my welcoming personality would have been mistaken for “come on

in and live with us for awhile.” Boy, I hope that he doesn’t bring his friends and family along too.
I’d better not let him know how cute he is. My hubby’s going to give me that look when I tell him…the one that says “I told you so.”

When I told him of my little encounter the other day, and I said that I’d set the little guy on the porch, I got the look. I quickly responded to it that he found his way back out the door. Apparently, he found his way back in…all the way in. Uh-oh.

{again…not my photo’s…I think I need to wear my camera around my neck to actually use it ;o)}

Praise Our Maker Sunday-Everything Glorious

In Sunday Praise on January 25, 2009 at 2:26 pm

I’ve decided to share in Worship with you today. This is one of my most favorites. It lifts Him up and fills us with His Light! Enjoy…

Everything Glorious” by The David Crowder Band

PPP-Love, Conversations, Sunrise, Skiing and One Rose

In PPP Prompts, PPS-Poetry-Prose-Stories I've Written on January 24, 2009 at 9:31 pm

Okay, I’ve slacked a bit with placing some of my writings from LJ’s prompts on my own blog. I do want to keep them here, share them with those of you who don’t wander the blogosphere ;o), and have them for myself to print out. I keep paper copies of my blog…you know, it is a journal.

Here are a few that some of you haven’t seen yet. I know, it’s a little overwhelming to get such different types all at once ~ but you’ll manage ;o).

The prompt was {Love} a photo of a woman and a man standing together, looking into the world before them as the sun went down:

This is the night that they’d been dreading for a long while; the evening before they find themselves alone again.

They set out for a walk, hand in hand when the light of the sun going down touched their face at the same time; bringing warmth and a touch of oneness through their bodies. It was as though they felt the molding of oneness again.

Not knowing what to say, they simply squeezed each other’s hand.

As they reached the water’s edge, she felt and overwhelming wave rushing within her. She couldn’t hold it in any longer and a single tear ran down her cheek. He caught glimpse from the corner of his eye and he pulled her close.

No words are said, he held her as she let go. She let it out, knowing it was alright. Even though this was their last night together, in this way; she knew that tomorrow would hold promise for a new future.

Holding her closely, he says “Honey, you’ll always be his mommy. It doesn’t matter if he’s living in his own bedroom or in a college dorm somewhere. You’re in his heart and he will always need you; not to pick up his clothes or make him his dinner. He needs you because you love him unconditionally, like no other person ever will. You love me in this same way, Honey. I know it hurts right now, but you’ll see that the relationships you’ve built will remain strong because of your love that binds them.”


The prompt was {Conversations} a photo that showed very colorful umbrellas where many a people would gather for a lunch chat. There are some very interesting conversations going on
down there, eavesdrop a bit and share with us:

Don’t you wish that you could be a fly on the wall? ~ a song I hear often on the Disney Channel by Miley Cyrus….

It sure would be nice to hear myself think for a moment. All of these people sound like bee’s working at their hives and all they do is complain about the life they live.

Okay now, hold steady, I’ve almost got it. What? Who said that? No, tell me they didn’t see me here. {sigh}

“SHOO! Go away! Nasty bug!”, that’s all that I hear. Don’t they know that I need to eat too? What is wrong with these overgrown yapping fools?

Oh, wait…there’s something. Aaaah, at last; a sweet delight. Mmmm, it tastes dreamy.

* splat *

The prompt was {Sunrise} and the photo was beautiful sunshine rising up over the mountain in the distance, overlooking the soft field. Write of a sunrise:

She knelt down on the floor, trying to muster the last few breathes of strength that she had within her.

“Jesus”, she said “I do believe. With all of my heart, I do. I know that you are God’s Son. I believe that you died for all of my sins. Forgive me, Lord. Forgive me for not believing. I put my trust in You today; right now, I give you my life.”

At each bit of darkness that she pulled from her soul, He threw it into the Pit. She felt a surge of warmth rush through her at that very moment. As the sun rises over the mountaintop each morning, she could feel her soul shining with the hope of a new day.

The prompt was {Skiing} and the photo shows a crisp inviting scene to any skiers eye. Write today and include skiing or snowboarding in your verse or prose:

He has all of his gear ready to go
almost tasting the air’s chill
before even attempting the outing

Anticipation fills him up
as he approaches the door
and he can feel the adventure waiting ahead

The first step onto the snow
crunches icy trembles into his body
and he pushes himself onward

Just a little too fast
he lands abruptly onto his bottom
and looks up to the face above him

“Are you alright, son?”
With a tear in his eye
he nods his head and gets up

Standing firmly on the snow
he takes a deep breathe
and trudges onward
making it to his goal

He’s seen the big guys do it on TV
looking so easy to him
wanting to do the same, he tries

The sunlight is fading away
as they pack the gear into the car
“Did you have fun, son?”
with a smile on his face, he nods

“Daddy, can we do it again tomorrow?”


The prompt was {One Rose} and the photo shows an Asian man sitting in a bus or something, with one rose on his lap. He’s looking out the window. Tell me the story of this man in this moment. What happened before, what happens next?

Such sweet gesture, to give to me this one rose. If only I am able to go to ride that bicycle with her. I do love that little girl, but she cannot come home with me. They will not accept her there. I wonder, was it a mistake to love her mother? No, it could not have been. If only my life could be different, my future with my daughter in it. If only I could be the father to her that I desire to be. If only….

The only other girl in the house.

In Family Pets, My Family on January 24, 2009 at 12:43 am

Meet Grace or Gracie, depending on whether she’s been naughty or nice. This is our doggy girl.
Doesn’t she look really similar to the dog that I use in my blogger backgrounds? I think so, nearly identical if I were to pose her in the same position; although, she is a little larger.

It’s not easy to get a really great picture of her. For some reason, she’s always making a goofy face. But we keep trying, because she’s so pretty.

I liked this profile shot…pretty precise.


Hubby took this shot.
She picks at me all of the time, trying to lick my face;
and knows I can’t stand it.
I realize that I’m smiling
…it’s like being tickled.

She REALLY tries to be a lap dog
now and then.

I’ll have to post someday about how we found this pretty girl and show you the pup picture of her…but this is all that I have for now.